For the past couple of days I've been trying to think of a way to talk about time. How fast or slow it goes. How you look back and can't figure out how everything happened in what felt like a short amount of time. Or how long that moment a month ago feels.
Time is everything.
The last two weeks I have been struggling with time. Mainly because it feels like it hasn't been going fast enough. Between visitors and adventures around this tiny island, life moved pretty fast. And then I hit a wall. One in which the last two weeks took FOREVER. Truth be told, I woke up on Monday morning this week wondering how it was still July. Surely this month had to be over already? Not so.
But now, 8-ish hours before August 1st (on this side of the ocean) and I can't help but feel time speeding up again. Three weeks from today my second master's thesis is due. Three weeks from tomorrow is my last full day in Dublin. Three weeks from Friday I am boarding a plane to Boston ad then to Philadelphia.
Three weeks.
Now all I can do is think about time. Will I get it all done? Will I manage to do the last couple things I want to do while I am here? Am I actually ready to leave? Will I miss the city I have been cursing for the last couple of weeks?
We can't stop time. We can't speed it up or slow it down. We can just live it. One minute at a time. One day at a time. One week at a time.
Wherever you are, whatever you are doing: enjoy the moment. Take everything in and know that these moments, even the ones you're wishing and praying to go faster, are the ones that are changing your life.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Thursday, July 18, 2013
Past. Present. Future.
I often think I should have titled this blog something different. Like: "Ramblings from a Confused 25 year old" or "Please Hold While I Experience Another Moment of Panic because my Life is not going the Way I Want it to". The fact of the matter is that if I had titled this blog one of those I could just say whatever I want with no real point or follow through.
But, what fun would that be? How would that push me to strive for more?
Spoiler Alert! It wouldn't. So here I am striving for more. Being confused. Having moments of panic. And here's why it matters.
Ever since the beginning of June I've found myself constantly thinking of how I got to this point in life. Sure, part of it was probably because I had just graduated with a masters degree, but there was and is more than that.
June 1st marked an important anniversary in my life. On June 1st 5 years ago I began an adventure that changed my life. It was an adventure that marked a turning point of how I saw myself, the world, and myself in the world. I spent 11 weeks that summer in a new place, with new people, experiencing so many new things. I grew up that summer (seriously, ask my Mom, she'll tell you). I learned that I mattered and that my thoughts and opinions mattered too. I learned that my life is deeply connected to the lives of the billions of people living on this planet. I learned that that connection means that my choices affect their choices; my life affect their lives. That summer I broke the bubble I was living in and it is impossible to go back. And for that, I am grateful.
With the end of June came another important anniversary. This time, it wasn't mine. On June 23rd my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. I have no idea who my parents were 40 years ago but I found myself reflecting on their years together. I found myself in awe that in the course of 40 years these two wonderful people managed to build a life together that is withstanding the test of time. What's more, I found myself amazed that they managed to raise 3 wonderful children (I know, I'm biased) when I can't even manage to go grocery shopping on a regular basis. All of this made me realize how lucky I am that they found each other, created a life for themselves, my brothers and I, and raised me to be the person I am today.
Back when I was in high school I had a friend who celebrated her birthday at the end of June. The year she turned 16 her mom threw her a surprise birthday party (which we are going to pretend was in June because it goes with the anniversary theme but the actual date escapes me). At this particular birthday party I met two of my favorite people who I now consider to be two of my best friends. The friendship I have with these women, and the many other friends I have made along the way, have shaped me into the person I am today. Without them I wouldn't laugh as much or cry as much (just kidding, I cry enough on my own). Without the friendships I have formed over the years I wouldn't have the support system that gets me through all the crazy adventures of life. Every single person I am friends with brings something different to the friendship and selfishly they all enable me to grow and learn more and more about myself. These individuals, no matter where they are, continue to be my support system and I am positive I would fall apart without them.
I lay these things out because they are my past, they are my present and they will become my future. These anniversaries and these people are what I lean on when my life gets confusing or I start to panic. They are the things I am grateful for when I realize how often I can take them for granted. They are the reason I smile and laugh ad even cry. They have changed my life for the better and I'm more than certain they will continue to do so.
In an effort to strive for more I encourage you to reflect on the things and people that have changed your life. They are why you are here and they are how you will get to where you're going. Be thankful for every experience they have given you, good or bad. And strive to be an experience for someone else so they too can add you to the list of people who have changed their life.
But, what fun would that be? How would that push me to strive for more?
Spoiler Alert! It wouldn't. So here I am striving for more. Being confused. Having moments of panic. And here's why it matters.
Ever since the beginning of June I've found myself constantly thinking of how I got to this point in life. Sure, part of it was probably because I had just graduated with a masters degree, but there was and is more than that.
June 1st marked an important anniversary in my life. On June 1st 5 years ago I began an adventure that changed my life. It was an adventure that marked a turning point of how I saw myself, the world, and myself in the world. I spent 11 weeks that summer in a new place, with new people, experiencing so many new things. I grew up that summer (seriously, ask my Mom, she'll tell you). I learned that I mattered and that my thoughts and opinions mattered too. I learned that my life is deeply connected to the lives of the billions of people living on this planet. I learned that that connection means that my choices affect their choices; my life affect their lives. That summer I broke the bubble I was living in and it is impossible to go back. And for that, I am grateful.
With the end of June came another important anniversary. This time, it wasn't mine. On June 23rd my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary. I have no idea who my parents were 40 years ago but I found myself reflecting on their years together. I found myself in awe that in the course of 40 years these two wonderful people managed to build a life together that is withstanding the test of time. What's more, I found myself amazed that they managed to raise 3 wonderful children (I know, I'm biased) when I can't even manage to go grocery shopping on a regular basis. All of this made me realize how lucky I am that they found each other, created a life for themselves, my brothers and I, and raised me to be the person I am today.
Back when I was in high school I had a friend who celebrated her birthday at the end of June. The year she turned 16 her mom threw her a surprise birthday party (which we are going to pretend was in June because it goes with the anniversary theme but the actual date escapes me). At this particular birthday party I met two of my favorite people who I now consider to be two of my best friends. The friendship I have with these women, and the many other friends I have made along the way, have shaped me into the person I am today. Without them I wouldn't laugh as much or cry as much (just kidding, I cry enough on my own). Without the friendships I have formed over the years I wouldn't have the support system that gets me through all the crazy adventures of life. Every single person I am friends with brings something different to the friendship and selfishly they all enable me to grow and learn more and more about myself. These individuals, no matter where they are, continue to be my support system and I am positive I would fall apart without them.
I lay these things out because they are my past, they are my present and they will become my future. These anniversaries and these people are what I lean on when my life gets confusing or I start to panic. They are the things I am grateful for when I realize how often I can take them for granted. They are the reason I smile and laugh ad even cry. They have changed my life for the better and I'm more than certain they will continue to do so.
In an effort to strive for more I encourage you to reflect on the things and people that have changed your life. They are why you are here and they are how you will get to where you're going. Be thankful for every experience they have given you, good or bad. And strive to be an experience for someone else so they too can add you to the list of people who have changed their life.
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