If you have decided to use this blog as a way of keeping yourself updated on the life and times of Maureen Plover, you're in luck because I'm going to give you just that!
If you stumbled upon my life last week you would have come to find that I was preparing myself for a second job interview for a campus minister position. As of this past Thursday at 9:30 Irish time I did not get the job. Oh well, Texas is too hot anyway. However, out of this not so fabulous news came a conversation that I like to see as a silver lining to my rejection and what prompted this post. Here we go:
So, here I am, Thursday night enjoying myself some Guinness with my friend Adrian when I got the job rejection e-mail. This of course caused for more drinking, but that is a story for another time! Anyway, after the initial shock, the conversation turned to a reflection on life and how we ended up to that point in time. I found myself recounting the ever important story of how my plans for after my college graduation didn't go as smoothly as I had hoped for. I found myself reflecting on what could have been if things had gone differently. Not what if I had done something differently, but if things in general had gone differently, because I think there is a difference.
Perplexed? Yeah, don't worry, Adrian was too! I'll explain.
I make the distinction between the two as seeing life in terms of things you personally did or did not do AND reflecting on the things that others did or did not do. Both are surely connected but if taken separately there's a different type of reflection involved.
Here's the story for reflecting on the question of "What if I did/did not..." in reference to my senior year of college:
My experiences leading up to my senior year of college led me to believe that the cool thing to do after graduation was a year of service. A lot of my friends were doing it so I assumed that's what I was supposed to do. I started looking into programs and found some and applied to them. I went on to interviews in Chicago and Phoenix. Neither of those options panned out and I decided to go to grad school instead of going out to find a big girl job. During my first year of grad school I made the decision to transfer to another program. During my second year of grad school I decided to go to Ireland for the year. And here I am.
Here's the story for reflecting on the question of "What could have been if someone else did/did not..." also in reference to my senior year of college:
When I told my mom and dad I was thinking about doing a year of service my dad had no clue what I was talking about and urged me to look into grad school too. On his advice I found myself looking into peace, justice and conflict resolution programs and I feel in love with one particular program but I ignored it because I was geared up to go do a year of service. As I mentioned earlier, the year of service programs didn't pan out because the one program I really liked didn't accept me. I ended up going to grad school because my very good friend Robyn said I could live in her attic and my other personal connections allowed me to get a job. I transferred grad programs because a professor I respect very much encouraged me to go out and find something else. I came to Ireland because the first grad program I picked put a high emphasis on studying abroad and allowed me to have this experience. And here I am.
Both of these reflections ultimately got me to the same place: Dublin, Ireland. But, if one thing had been different, whether on the part of me or someone else, I may not be in this exact place, in this exact moment writing this post. I may have not had experiences that changed me for the better or experiences that tested who I am as a person. I may have not met some of my best friends or learned that there is in fact an alcohol family tree. Had one single thing been different, I would have been different.
It is vital to take time to reflect on your life and think about the things you could have done differently. But it is equally important to reflect on how your life could have been different if someone else had done something different.
As humans, we are forever affected by not just our own actions but the actions of others.
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